Saturday, November 24, 2007

The Turkey Has Landed

Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving. I enjoyed cooking and eating. This has been a busy weekend and still have a lot left to do before it is over.

I was planning on posting all the things I am thankful for this morning. (and there really are a lot of things)...but the "turkey" landed on us last night.

Ex and I have an "every other year" parenting plan for holidays. This is Ex's year. However, a couple of weeks ago he called and said that he had decided to go to Vegas over the holiday and Zack could stay home. He flew back into town yesterday. Anyway, Zack and I didn't think as we made our plans for the weekend that Ex would be having him at his house for the rest of the weekend. Zack has had basketball practice every day (except Thursday) and was planning on going again this morning. They have their first game on Tuesday. (For those of you who don't know, he made 1st string on the JV team.) Well, we couldn't have a completely nice weekend now, could we?

Ex called last night at about 10 pm. He set us up with a test and we didn't pass. He asked what Zack was doing today. I told him he had practice and then was going to come home and help me do some things and then had plans with friends tonight. WRONG ANSWER! Ex flipped out...said this was his weekend and it was "nice" that I made plans for Zack without even checking with him. The phone calls kept up until about 1:00 am. He was ranting and raving about the fact that Zack didn't even call him to wish him a Happy Thanksgiving. He doesn't take into account that HE gave up his time with Zack to go to Vegas. Anyway, long story short...not much sleep last night AND he showed up here at 7:30 am to pick Zack up and make sure that he DIDN'T get to go to practice this morning. Zack is now fearing that he won't get to play on Tuesday because he missed a practice.

This is the time I kick myself for ever bringing Zack out here to live. We came here so that he could have a relationship with his Dad. I was hoping Ex would be a better father than husband. Nope, as a matter of fact, he's a worse father than husband. I was an adult and though it took me awhile, I eventually realized that it was his problems and not really mine. I don't know if Zack is getting that yet. I know he's in pain and I feel responsible.

As he left this morning I hugged him and whispered in his ear, "don't let him win". Say a quick prayer for him this morning. I know he could use it.

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Day beforeThanksgiving

5 days OFF! Gee, what will I do with all that time? Hmmmm, lesson plans? Yeah. Grading papers? Yeah. Packing and getting ready to move? Yeah. Cooking a small Thanksgiving dinner to go with the room-mates' prime rib? Yeah. Laundry? Yeah. Getting Zack back and forth to basketball practice? Yeah.

OK, well, I really do have 5 days off. I have a lot to do...but when I'm "off" I can do it when I want to. My goal is not to save 90% of it to do until Sunday afternoon and evening.

This morning I'm off to Goodwill, Value Village, and a couple other thrift stores...I don't think I'll find beds, but still need an entertainment center and a living room chair or love seat. I'm not ashamed to shop there...if someone were to ask my decorating style, I would say "early Grandma's attic". I like old things. They can't be dirty to too damaged...they have to have character. I get excited when I find something really cheap, yet with character and little need for repair. They built things better in the old days!

Later today I will post my "annual" Thanksgiving thanks list. *This will actually be the FIRST annual since I didn't have a blog last year....just wanted to set the anticipatory mood.

Gotta get going and get the shopping adventure underway!

Monday, November 19, 2007

Turkey vs. Prime Rib

I love Thanksgiving. I love the whole process of cooking Thanksgiving dinner. I haven't been able to do that for a couple of years now. Guess it will be another year before I get the pleasure.

Room-mate doesn't have her kids this year. For 2 weeks she has been talking about her and boyfriend (who does have his son) going out to eat. I kept saying that since they weren't cooking here, I was going to be making a big, traditional Thanksgiving dinner (crazy me, I still like tradition) and instead of going out to eat, they should just have dinner with us. I've had the menu and the grocery list made up for a week, and was really looking forward to my day in the kitchen.

So, last night, right before they went to bed room-mate calls me. (Yeah, she was in her bedroom about 90 feet away and she called me.) They have decided they are going to have dinner here, but boyfriend wants prime rib. (FOR THANKSGIVING???) She said that if I want to cook a small turkey earlier in the day, they will allow time for that and that boyfriend will make the stuffing/dressing because he has a great recipe for cornbread dressing.

Well, turkey poop! It wasn't about cooking a turkey. We've had invitations to traditional dinners that we've turned down. I'm sure we could call up and re-invite ourselves, but I really need the day to get moving stuff done and just want to be able to spend the day at home working on things that I need to work on. So, I guess we'll be eating prime rib.

And again, God teaches me things through these little frustrations. I can't spend the week pouting and whining. I will get the things done that I need to get done and eat the prime rib and will cook a Thanksgiving dinner soon after we get moved into our own place. I have to accept that I can't control these things.

We don't always have control over situations, God wants us to let go of our control and give it back to Him. I've never considered myself a real controlling person, but I like things to go the way I plan them (guess that makes me a somewhat controlling person)...sometimes God has other plans. We want "turkey" and He wants to give us "prime rib".

Quit whining and enjoy the prime rib.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

I'm running out of catchy titles

Wow! Thanksgiving is NEXT WEEK! How can that be? I promise, sometime between now and then I'll tell you all that I am thankful for.

We've had a rather interesting few days here at the homefront. I love being a mother...most of the time, but there's not a book out there with everything you need to know (besides the Bible, of course). After all the years I've worked with teenagers, I often look at my own and know that we all need help sometimes. Can't go into details, but the final outcome of this past weekend is that Zack no longer has computer or cell phone privileges. He is going through WITHDRAWAL. I also want to warn anyone who's kid is on Myspace...there are places they can hide what they are doing. I have had access to his Myspace since we allowed him to use it...but stuff was hidden somehow. His Dad (who always seems to expect the worst) put spyware on his computer and ...well, that's all I will say on the subject. (Except that I must add, I HATE when he's right.) But I went through a weekend of feeling like I'm not passing this course (parenthood) with flying colors. Opened up a lot of great conversation and a bit of pouting here and there...but that's to be expected. Discipline is never easy for any of us...the givers, the receivers, etc.

One day he will realize he was truly loved and protected...of course, I'll be 80 years old by then. (smile)

I reminded him that no matter what, I love him and God loves him. In reminding him of this I was reminded that no matter what...my ability to whine and complain about everything, my lack of discipline (eating, smoking, etc.), my lack of faith, etc....God still loves me too.

During all of that "stuff", room-mate's 10 year old and 8 year old had a birthday party sleepover. 8 little boys above my head most of the weekend. It wasn't too bad until the bat flew into the living room through the chimney. I was sleeping, but the blood curdling screams woke me up. (the screams came from room-mate's boyfriend). She chased the bat out of the front window with a broom while he held up a towel (mostly around his head) so that the bat wouldn't fly down the hall. (yeah, right) It was funny.

Moving day is coming quickly...YIKES!

Tuesday, November 6, 2007

What's my combination?

Remember the dream about being "underclothed" and standing in the hall at high school trying to remember your combination? The more you turn the dial...the further away from the real combination you are. Your heart is pounding, your palms are sweating...the bell is about to ring and you are standing there in the hall in your birthday suit or granny underwear. Aaaugh!

This is the time of year I start getting that feeling... all the time. I guess it's the stress of the upcoming holidays. They are supposed to be a time of family and fun and love and instead they are a time of: no money, Thanksgiving dinner, Christmas cards--no one knows my address, no money, gifts, mailing gifts, no money, decorations, tree, holiday activities, no money....

So, add to that...moving in three weeks...and creating lesson plans, grading papers, doing laundry (how do 2 people use that many clothes?), figuring out meals, making lunches..I think you are getting my drift.

The good news, I don't need meditation or medication...just need to stay in prayer and keep things fresh with God. He'll get me through, help me find the JOY and keep those creative juices flowing. He'll help me remember the combination if I keep trusting Him.

Have a great day!

Saturday, November 3, 2007

The Theme of my year

It's funny, when I chose the name of my blog I really didn't realize it would become a theme. I mean, I know that as a Christian, I am always still in the planning stages of my life. I'm always preparing for the next test, or for the next person whom I can help through the "wisdom of my own experience", etc. Anyway, the theme just keeps on.

I went to see the new house. Now, in case you don't know this about me, I have always been the person who can look at the lump of coal and see the diamond inside. (Diamonds and coal really don't have anything to do with each other, do they?) I saw this in my ex-husband...and married the lump of coal anyway (should have waited for the diamond to make an appearance)...Anyway, the house is similar to a lump of coal. It was built in the 1920's and I don't think the lawn has had anything done to it since then. Right now there does not appear to be grass surrounding the house, but instead briers, weeds, and possibly wheat. The inside of the house is in several stages of work. The basement is large and has a work area (with w/d hook-up), an extra room, and a separate pantry area. However, it is missing several windows (which the owner says will be replaced) and vines have grown through the open spaces and into the area. I'm also wondering what types of small (or large) animals may have come through those same holes. The kitchen is small, but will serve it's purpose...just as soon as they replace the track lighting for regular lights. The attic (which will be Zack's room) was stripped to the bare wood...but the owner was working on that when we got there the other night. It will be a nice space for Zack (my friends who will help move will hate me though when we start moving things up through those tiny stairs.) The two bedrooms downstairs...well, my bed will fit in one...the smaller one will serve as a closet/office. I'm not even going to venture a guess as to why there are 3 large hooks hanging in what will be my bedroom. I will merely find some cool lamps and plants to hang from them.

The point is...I see a gem there. I see the potential in what it will look like with a chair here, a rug there, a flower bed under the picture window. It's got character...cute little fireplace and mantle in the living room...walls curve into the ceiling (everything is stucco). I'm excited about living there (though to be honest, dreading moving again). The house will be up for sale after the first of the year. It could go in a month...or it could take a year.

The point is...the house and my life are still in the planning stages. I don't know what the final product will look like, but it's exciting trusting God through the whole process.