Down...but not out

I called North Sound again. I still haven't talked with Mr. Osborn, but his assistant informed me yesterday that it would be awhile before I would hear anything because Mr. Osborn has decided to interview other applicants. Last I heard that weren't any other applicants, but things change.

My first reaction was one of defeat. Obviously, he wasn't impressed enough to choose me right off the bat. I don't know why, I would like to speak with him to find out, but he hasn't returned any of my phone calls and at this point the ball is in his (and God's) court.

I moved here (to Washington) 5 years ago. Up until that time, I had been gainfully employed since I was 16 (except for the 4 years I went to college, during which I worked all 4 years at the college on a work study program). Until 5 years ago, I don't think I ever interviewed for a job that I didn't get. Until 5 years ago, I always made enough money to cover my bills and actually buy groceries and often had a little left over for extras. Until 5 years ago, I lived independently without having to pray for a way to make it through the week. I was the one helping people out and not the one being helped.

I'm not sure why the last 5 years have been like they have been. I know I have learned more about faith and prayer and my personal relationship with Jesus. I suppose He allows us to go through trials to learn more about His love and patience. But I have to be honest...it's been humiliating for me. It doesn't appear that I can get a job. It doesn't appear that I can take care of myself and Zack...and there have been many times that if not for the generosity of others, I wouldn't have been able to.

I still believe that I would be an asset to North Sound Christian High School. I haven't given up on that yet...but guess I need to keep my mind and heart open to God's leading.