Zack at 14

OK, don't call 911...I made it out alive. If I must say, the room looks great...now on to the rest of the house.

Zack came home from camp full of stories and great experiences. I'm so glad he got to go this year. I had to take him immediately to his Dad's house for a few days. (We split time during the summer.) He hugged and kissed me when I picked him up (which is unusual for a 14 year old boy...especially in public)...and then again when I dropped him off at his Dad's.

Then this morning, I made him mad. I have a tendency to do that a lot these days. I feel like I have to say "no" now, more than I did when he was a busy toddler. Now he's a busy teenager...and he feels like he should be independent already. He called to ask if he could spend the 4th of July with his best friend K. K is 16 and has his license and a car. The plan did not include any adult supervision...I don't count the 19 year old female cousin who just moved here to get away from all the "trouble" she was in at home. Zack, on the other hand, believes that she is adult supervision.

I remember hearing my own Mom go on and on about the trouble kids can get into without supervision and thinking she was just too strict and old fashioned. Now I find myself in that same place. I remember her saying "I know what it's like to be a teenager". I would think to myself, "oh yeah, back in the days before electricity was invented". I'm sure my son feels the same way. He doesn't think I remember being a teenager. OK, I have to admit, I have to think hard...but the fact is, I have worked with teenagers for almost 30 years now, so I REALLY do know what it's like to be a teenager. So when I say no, he thinks I'm being too strict and old fashioned.

Someday (in about 10 years), he'll realize why I say no when I do...until then, I'll be the "mean ole Mom". It's my job.

Housecleaning

Zack comes home from camp this afternoon. I'm going to clean his room...I have a shovel, face mask, and gloves. I have definitely allowed him to have his own "space"...but right now, I have to clean it and give him a fresh canvas to start over in. I'm pretty sure it will be a mess again before the end of the week, but feeling like I have to do my "motherly" duty.

My Mom was "June Cleaver". If you don't remember June Cleaver, she was the Beav's mom. She wore a dress with pearls and always an apron...OK, my Mom didn't wear the pearls, but our house was always PERFECT. I should look back at that with appreciation, but I really don't. Our house was never dirty, yet every Saturday was house cleaning day...and I DO mean day! It took ALL DAY to clean an already clean house. We were never (and I do mean never) allowed to wear shoes in the house. We weren't allowed to close our bedroom doors and our rooms needed to be ready for viewing at all times...beds made, clothes put away, all knick-knacks in place, nothing out of place. We were only allowed to sit on the living room furniture when we had company. I AM NOT KIDDING! (However, I would like to note that when she sold the furniture to a relative 25 years after buying it, it looked brand new.) There were never any dishes in our sink or in a drain rack. They were washed, (even before going into the dishwasher), dried and put away IMMEDIATELY after each meal. I love my Mom, but lots of family time and fun time was given up because the house was "dirty". I found out later in life that her "perfect" house actually came from some things that happened in her childhood that made her feel so imperfect on the inside...but as a kid I didn't have that knowledge.

I definitely have not followed in my Mom's footsteps. My house is lived in...right now a little too lived in. Saturday is NEVER cleaning day...there is no designated day...just when I have a little extra time on my hands. We wear our shoes in the house if we want to, we even put our feet (without shoes) on the furniture. There are often dishes in the sink and I don't wash them in soapy water before putting them in the dishwasher. I use dishtowels to wipe my hands...anything that doesn't go in the dishwasher air dries. You wouldn't want to eat off of any of our floors. I still find little puffs of dog hair and the dog has been gone for a while now.

Maybe I should have found a balance. I always make plans to do better...but life is busy and the house is just not always my first priority. However, today 2 rooms are going to become a priority (can't really do his unless mine is a good example).

OK, have avoided it long enough...I'm going in, if you don't see a blog for awhile, please call 911.

Still in the weeds

Ok, I actually spent 3 hours (off and on) trying to cut the huge weeds that I would like to call a yard. I don't even have a quarter of the front yard done...but the summer lies ahead of me (and Zack...my 14 year old...gets home from camp tomorrow). I started to get discouraged after working and not getting much done. Then I realized that it takes a long time to get ourselves in these weeds...why do we think in one afternoon we can get them cleared from our lives?

That's how life is. It took me years to become overweight...I'm not going to get thin overnight. It took me months to stack up all the disorganization in this house...I'm not going to organize in one day. Etc. Etc. I just have to plug along...that's what life's all about.

Today I'm taking a DAY OFF with a really good friend. Jimi and I are going 20 miles to her lake house (on a very small lake). It's going to be just us...eating, giggling, fishing, and just relaxing! I'm not going to think about my house or my yard or anything else hanging over my head right now. I'm going to enjoy a beautiful day by the lake with a really great friend.

Hope you all have a GREAT day!

SUMMER

It's SUMMER!!! The sun is shining...the birds are singing...I slept in until 8 (after getting up at 5 for the last 9 months, that IS sleeping in)...and I am ready to go out in the yard and start "weed whacking". I have been putting it off for three days now.

Monday I dropped Zack off at the church for a week of camp, then came home and literally got off of the couch only to eat, go to the bathroom, and get more to eat. Yesterday I went back to school to clean out my room. For some reason, I had it pegged as a one to two hour job...6 hours later, I had the car completely packed and was ready to come home. So, today, I face the yard.

This shouldn't be so daunting...but it is. When we moved here in December, the yard was in bad condition. Front part was about 6 inches high and nothing but what looked like small twigs of something...back yard looked like a very wet wheat field...of course, can't do much of yard work December through at least March and April. Then we had snow in March AND April (really unusual for the Pacific Northwest unless you live in the mountains)...so, by the end of April when it started drying up, I knew we had to get to it soon. Of course, being a renter, I have no lawn mower or anything. I did ask the landlord several times if they could loan us a mower...needless to say, it never happened...so now I am looking at a wheat field surrounding my house. A mower wouldn't be able to get through it. I am getting ready to begin "whacking" a quarter of an acre so that we actually can begin mowing again. I guess I could save it for Zack...but I'm getting embarrassed by the looks of people driving by, as well as the neighbors. I have taken to putting up my hoodie as I leave the house and trying hard not to return until after dark. Since sunset doesn't happen until after 9, that is getting harder and harder.

I have to "get er done". I am taking this as a life lesson...when we don't take care of things that need taking care of...they get to a point that makes the task look impossible. I'm thinking of several issues in my own life. My weight...instead of handling it when it started getting out of control (how many years ago was that?)...I just keep letting it go. Now I am facing the fact that I HAVE to get rid of extra weight for numerous reasons...most of them health related. My house...another area that I have let go. It's not "dirty" dirty...just unorganized dirty. The condition of my cluttered house makes my head get cluttered. I could go on...but, at this point I am just avoiding going out there.

My lesson for today will be to quit avoiding and start mowing things when they need mowed. Off to the yard!