Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Birthdays

Yesterday I "celebrated" the 14th anniversary of my 39th birthday. Maybe it's me...but I don't enjoy growing older. I have to be honest, instead of looking at it as another wonderful year full of accomplishments...I just start thinking about what I haven't done, where I should be, what I could have done and didn't...etc.etc. No wonder I don't like birthdays.

I had a good day yesterday. Zack and I had just returned from a WONDERFUL camping weekend with our church home group. Yesterday I slept in a little, got up to several phone calls from family and friends, then Zack and I headed off for a couple of hours at a nearby lake where we spent some time with our former room-mate and her two sons. It was sunny and bright...a beautiful day. We came home, showered and got ready for a dinner at Red Lobster. (My treat to me.) Zack got me a portable grill and we are going to use it tonight for grilled shrimp and steaks. We were going to go to a movie last night too...but after eating a full, rich meal...I was ready for bed. So, we saved the movie for tonight.

However, even as we had that wonderful day...in the back of my mind were negative thoughts running over and over....you should own your own home, you should be out of debt, you should be thinner,you should be healthier, you should be more prepared for retirement...I just let it keep running and running through my mind, until it had me weighed down to the point that I had stopped enjoying the day. Last night as I tried to get to sleep, I was having this conversation in my head one more time and FINALLY (I know, I know) I started praying and asked God to keep these thoughts from overpowering my thoughts. Well, He didn't wave His magic wand and make only happy thoughts run through my head. But, He did pop a couple of thoughts into my head and the realization that if I would think of them instead of the negative thoughts, it might make a difference.

As I lay there getting ready to fall asleep, I started to thinking of what I do have and what I have accomplished...I have a beautiful, wonderful (even though he is a teenager) son who loves me. Of course, he is playing his part as a teenager and not showing that love on most days, but when it's needed or necessary...there he is. I have wonderful friends, some of them I've known for just a few years, some I've known for over half of my life. These people are there when I need them. They laugh with me, cry with me, pray with me and for me, share with me, and allow me to be a part of their lives. I have a wonderful church...I could write another blog on what my church does for me. I have family that loves me (though they are so far away) and I have a career that I love. It challenges me and brings me so much joy. The list goes on and on.

As I began listing these things, I thanked God for another year to live this wonderful life. I thanked Him for the many opportunities and blessings that He has given me, as well as the many opportunities and blessings that are yet to come.

Have a great day!

1 comment:

Miriam said...

O happy birthday! I wish I had known :)