My Time

Time...hours, minutes, seconds...sometimes I think that there is no time for me. I make a plan to use MY time (wisely or not so wisely)...and somehow it gets used elsewhere. Zack is with his Dad this weekend, so in my mind as I am planning my weekend, I have lots of time. But, somehow, it always goes to someone else.

Friday evening...Zack has basketball practice until 5:00. Then I have to cart him to his Dad's house. I do 75% of the transporting and it's a 25 mile trip one way. It wouldn't be so bad except that there is NO PLACE in the great NorthWest where traffic is NOT an issue. (At least, no place that I have found.) Fridays are the worst. So, a 50 mile round trip can't be done in an hour...on a good day, I can sometimes do it in 2 hours, but usually closer to 3. Needed to hurry back to go to a movie with a friend I have been promising for weeks. As I was rushing back, she called to reschedule for Sunday afternoon. I don't know why I couldn't have just said, "Sunday isn't really good for me." But, that's where I need to learn to speak up for my time. So, got home and thought about starting to take down the Christmas decorations or doing lesson plans...but Friday evenings I am usually drained...emotionally, physically, etc. And this week was an emotional one (another story for later)...so, I fixed a nice dinner for myself and plopped into a chair to enjoy "Friday Night Lights" and could barely keep my eyes open until 10:00 PM. (Remember when we were young and could actually stay up until 2:00 AM on Fridays?)

Saturday morning: Up early and out for a National Honor Society brunch. I am co-advisor because, hey, I have nothing else to do with my spare time. The plan was to leave there at noon and head for home to get all Christmas down, START unpacking boxes (gee, I only moved on the 15th of December...did you really think I would be unpacked yet?) HOWEVER, as I was leaving the brunch, I got a phone call from ex. Zack was going to be allowed to play in his basketball game afterall. (another long story which will probably not be told, but has to do with the mental torture ex loves to put Zack and I through). So, instead of heading home, headed for the school and a really good basketball game (which we sadly lost by a great 3 point shot in the last minute). Instead of leaving right after that game, we let Zack stay and hang out for the girls game and went to Costco. I finally got home at about 4:00. I started taking down decorations...and worked until about 9:00. Had to quit then to make a quick run to K-Mart...never quick...and got back home at about 10:30. Did some more un-decorating while I watched a SAD Hallmark movie. Then went to bed.

So, here it is, Sunday morning at 7:00 am. I still have a Christmas tree (half decorated) in my living room...still don't know where the box is with clean socks...and have a butt load of stuff to do. I am supposed to be at church in 2 1/2 hours...stay for a meeting after church, go back for another meeting/party at 6:00 pm...go to a movie sometime during the afternoon...AND get the decorations down, living room stuff situated, make a path in the "box" room and at least know where some of the stuff we need is, get lesson plans done for the week and go back and pick Zack up sometime during all of that.

See what I mean about time? So, what I have decided to do...sometimes you just have to step out and take control...I'm skipping church. I really do have a huge headache. But, if I go, I will sit there thinking about all I have to do and how I'm not going to have time to get it done...I will not concentrate on God or on the message or anything. Instead, God and I are going to commune to some great music and prayer while I commence to "undecorate" and get some lesson plans done. I think I can at least have that done by 2:00 before I head out for a movie (that I will probably sleep through).

Looking at the calendar ahead of me...the next "free time" I may have is next Saturday. I'm not even going to think about planning it out.