Long Pause

Last week was just one of those weeks when I decided it was best to take a pause from writing a blog. I can tell you right now that there wouldn't have been a lot of positive thoughts coming from my keyboard. I try to maintain a positive outlook on every aspect of life. I try to keep my thoughts positive and happy. I believe that when I start thinking negatively, I am doubting God. But, I am human, and sometimes those thoughts creep in and overtake any positive thoughts I am even trying to have.

I don't want to say that I went through a week of doubting God totally, but I guess that's what it came down to. I was discouraged about the job situation. The principal who interviewed me is definitely gone. I have tried contacting the interim principal, but he has not responded to my e-mails. I was having financial struggles that just seemed overwhelming. Zack was grounded for the whole week, which made our relationship strained, at best. I got a haircut that I hate. See...you wouldn't have wanted to hear all that from me.

Have all those situations been rectified? Well, Zack isn't grounded anymore, we had a wonderful Mother's Day (thanks to someone at church who gave me money so that Zack and I could go out to a movie and lunch), pay day is tomorrow, nothing new on the job scene...but I am trusting God, my hair will grow out again...so no, not exactly rectified...but I just had to take a long pause. I had to sit with my thoughts and prayers and just "be still and know that He is God".

God understands me when I feel like that. He listens when I whine and complain and say "why me?" He is patient with me, even though He knows I should know better. Then in His little ways, He reminds me that He is in control. He has a plan and I have to learn to be more patient and wait on Him.

My reading today says it all: "This is the wonder of God's sovereignty. Working behind the scenes, He is moving and pushing and rearranging events and changing minds until He brings out of even the most carnal and secular of settings a decision that will set His perfect plan in place."

AMEN